Can I Change the Title to BITCH instead of BLOG?

So I know all I ever do is bring you down lately. I am just so down I can't seem to come up for air anymore. I would like to say things are looking up but whenever I think that, fate takes the wheel and down I go again. So...searching for some good news here. I have some GREAT online friends who I wish lived A LOT closer to me so I could talk to them in person. I wish I had more people like that here. On Friday I got a letter in the mail telling me that my application for food stamps was denied cause I make too much money...funny I thought a part time job and every other month child support checks didn't really push me over the limit...and then Tuesday Night I get a letter in the mail saying I was approved for food stamps and will have to report any change of income over $1,900...OK that's a lot different than my first letter...hmmmm. So today I checked the balance on my handy dandy EBT card and dog-gone-it if I don't have money for food on there! Yay! So today me and Mr. Bear went to good ole Walmart and picked up a bunch of food. I even cooked supper! Go me! In doing so I noticed EVERYTHING is jacked up in the kitchen cupboards. That is when it hits me, I have been so "in my own world" for the last couple months, and not taking care of anything really well, that I have not noticed that NO ONE in this apartment knows where shit goes and just places it willy-nilly wherever they think it can fit. So, i didn't get the dishes washed, but the cupboards are back in order. Now if only I could find a place to move into that I could possibly afford then I could KEEP them the way I want them. I guess right now I am waiting on HUD but I guess tomorrow I should start making some calls again to see if any of the Low Income Based housing places have had any openings come up. Ummm...other than that I have just stuff to bitch about...

So, I was mildly irritated to wake up this morning as I did not get as much sleep as one would guess I would on my night off. Bear woke up a lot, I stayed up late chatting, and the stupid cat wouldn't stay the hell off of me. I couldn't close the bedroom door cause it was like a freaking OVEN in there when I took Bear in to lay down thus the continued wake ups from the pussy. Then I get up and make me and Bear pancakes...we had barely enough mix to make one pancake, so I pulled out the biscuit mix and added it in with the mixins needed to make pancakes with it....then i added too much milk apparently. So then i mixed in some homemade batter to beef it up a bit...and then I tasted the first pancake. One of the mixes had gotten a very nasty stale taste to it, making my yummy I was craving so much pancakes taste just this side of assy. So, I added in some raspberries. To the batter and on top

while eating them. Now they were good, but not as good as they could be because of the hint of stale mix in there. Next time they will rock however I am sure! Then I had to get me and Bear around to do the aforementioned grocery shopping. That we accomplished rather well for the store packed with old people who only walk at a snails pace and have to stop in every single eisle and get in my way. Bear of course did NOT want to be in the cart and I kept him as happy as I could. Needless to say we made A LOT of noise. Mommy wanted to SCREAM too!! We made it home and Bear was out like a light. I wanted to be too, but it was almost 1pm by then...holy crap about 2 hours in the store?!? Yeah those people WERE walking SLOW! I had to put away all the groceries and get the soup i was making into the slow cooker so it would be ready by 5pm. I got all that done and my body said, Girl you need to eat something.

So I heated up some dip and pulled out some tortilla chips and started to eat. Now when I got home I toyed with the idea of waking Kevin up but he normally gets up around 1pm anyway, so I figured he would be up soon. So around 2:30 I finished all my crap and was eating my chips when he finally gets up. And then he can't figure out why I am irritable. Do I need to explain this to anyone else?!? Now I know he is under no obligation to help me or the kids. We are just living together right now...but OMG I am PISSED. Mostly because I know tomorrow I am going to get JACK ALL for sleep cause he is going out with friends tonight which means he ain't getting up no earlier tomorrow. UGH. So then I go lay down around 3pm. Can't sleep cause i am irritated but eventually drift off to dream land. Only to be awakened by voices outside my window.

I figure they will go away soon, no one really hangs out outside the apartment talking that long right?!? WRONG! It was Kevin and his friends. Why would I imagine that he would say, oh Karla is sleeping maybe we could go into the living room since the open window is right here? Why would I even expect that he would do more than say "Sorry we were trying to be quiet" when he was obviously practically running out the door to leave once I woke up. No need to offer to keep it down so I could get more sleep. No, really I don't need it. Seriously get me off this roller coaster ride before I stab someone in the EYE! It goes back and forth between let me help you, to why are you so crabby. No i don't have any fucking reason to be bitchy recently. And he thinks everything is getting better and we will be all hunkie dorie very soon. Yup, this did not help, and we weren't that close to begin with. Give an inch they take a fucking mile for granted. I give up. Seriously.